I used to have really fat feet, and I've only just realised. Having slipped on an old pair of loafers I'm taking to London with me as reserves, they're virtually flopping off while I pad down the road. Normally I'd be annoyed as it would mean yet more added expenditure (piling on to an already heaped mountain of London relocation cost), but, quite frankly, I've always had freakishly wide feet and anything to reign in the oddity is a massive plus.

So it seems I've managed to steer away from having hams for feet and now need a new pair of loafers.

P.S. I looked for a picture of "Fat feet", "Obese Feet" and "Swollen Feet" in Google images to liven up the post, but they are all far too grotesque to include.